Status Quo

What's cooking? How's it hanging? Sup? How's life treating you? Where have you been? Hows you? What are you upto? How are you feeling?

Every where I go I'm greeted by these inane questionnaires as to the nature of the beast known as r!tz. This past month I've spent working as a photographer, apprentice, artist, peon, secretary and marketing manager whilst keeping my head afloat and abreast of the waves. Work is mundane I've realised if it is considered in its mundane form i.e. work. However exciting and challenging and entertaining it maybe, if considered as work.. it fails to liberate one from his mundane existence.

My constant soul searching has also brought me to the realization that I simply wish to be comfortable; rich, contented and freedom to be. I am looking now for the most simple, effective and direct way to be where I want to be. I don't believe that hard work is the only way; though that seem to be my way currently. I'm however sure that my future has great things in store for me and that fame, fortune and fabulous women are just a hair's breadth away.

Being as I am a magnanimous and benevolent soul I am hereby offering you all.. YES! all of you a chance to benefit from this miracle about to happen. If you want to share in the fame and fortune and the spectacular orgies that are bound to take place hurry! Contact the author immediately! Payment accepted in the form of cash and kind.

All investments are subject to market risks and the schemes may go up or down depending upon the factors and forces affecting the securities market including the fluctuations in the interest rates. There can be no assurance that his schemes' investment objectives will be achieved. The past performance is not necessarily indicative of future performance of the schemes. The above do not in any manner indicate the quality of the schemes, their future prospects or returns. r!tz is not guaranteeing or assuring any dividend under any of the schemes. He is also not assuring that he will make any dividend distributions under the dividend plans of the schemes though he has every intention of doing so. All dividend distributions are subject to the investment performance of his schemes and are subject to availability of distribution surplus. The investments made by his schemes are subject to external risks. Please go through the offer documents before investing.